The 10 Commandments

The 10 Commandments of Prem & Jay:

1. Treat thyself
2. Laugh, laugh and laugh
3. Thou shalt not cook without washing your hands
4. Thou shalt not commit to anything by force
5. Treat each and everyone with respect
6. Never steal ... only borrow and then return when you're finished with it
7. Eat whatever you want whenever you want, just be healthy!
8. Science is amazing and everyone must appreciate the wonders of science
9. Treat all books with respect and they are filled with great knowledge 
10. Always stand up for what is right

Addicted

I am addicted, addicted to the same old things. I'm still addicted to that song. I still listen to it again and again. I don't know why, I just think it understands me. She sang that song for me.

I do feel like I am running in the dark. I do dream of hope. Regardless of time, place, emotional state of mind, we are always running in the dark. You see it everwhere, people who have everything going for them, but something happens and causes a major catastrophe. On the other hand you see people who have nothing in store for them in life. The biggest losers on earth people say...but then something happens, dreams turn into hope, hopes become a reality. Experience is a very important player in our lives, however many don't appreciate it.

With hope, perserverence, and dreams, I know that anything is possible.

Anything...

Speed Trials

The race has begun where everyone is thinking about the uncertainty of tomorrow. It's terrifying. I have been scared before, but not like this, this is a sort of subdued type of terrifying. Terrifying in a dull, sneaky way. Sneaky because the uncertainty is growing.

Chapter.

The uncertainty of each moment is surreal. Progression is also surreal. Progression into a new dimension of each person's life, a new chapter. Each new chapter may not be welcomed with such hospitality yet the lessons learned are equally as sufficient as the laugher of happiness contained in the next chapter or the chapter before it.

To define or describe life as chapters, like a book seems so petty, small and insignificant. Life is by far more important than books and chapters...life is too complex to be compared to a petty book. As some people don't like reading.

Scenarios, expectations, emotions, distortions of reality, and a muse...a tiny muse hiding in everybody's soul.

Typical it is the ramblings of someone who is half asleep, it may not make sense, but when I read this and think "what the fuck", I must remind myself that it made sense at the time. Life is what you make of it, not a little book.

Changes:

Before the 20th century man perceived all matter as being composed of material particles whose movements were governed by partial differential equations and Newton's laws of mechanics. Western man was preoccupied with casually sequenced events. He was out to conquer nature and fight the forces of evil. The world was thought to be as either for him or against him. Things were in black or white. Death was the enemy of life.

Now, physical reality is represented by continuous fileds governed by partial differential equations. At the sub-atomic realm, Newtonian physics has been replaced by quantum mechanics and the 'super string' theory. Matter and energy are interchangeable. Time and space are no longer seperate realities but complementary to each other. The three dimensions of space have incorporated a fourth dimension: space/time.

At the beginning of the 21st century our thinking seems to be veering towards the teachings of the east. In contrast to the thinking of the 20th century, we now agree that our world is neither static nor absolute. Everything is relative. Change is the only given, nothing remains the same, and all standards are relative. We are born, we mature, grow old and die. Then the cycle begins again. Life and death are but temporary manifestations of the same central reality. Midnight at home just means midday somewhere else. Only the fact of change itself is unchanging. Eventually, everything will return to the beginning of all things - Divine Intelligence of the Universe - because that is how the cycle began initially.

Blocks of Marble

I've been sitting here in the library for almost nine hours. Study done - 5/105 pages complete. It's not so fantastic, but I have been productive.

The applications that may just set the direction of my life have been made while I have been listening to my new favourite tune (Daniel - Bat For Lashes). I have applied literary everywhere - Oxford, Dublin, Germany, Barcelona, New York. Even though I would love to leave Ireland, leaving this country makes me a bit nervous but I know whatever happens will be the best. I've learned not to expect anything, ever.

Expectations. Expectations lead to disappointment. I dread disappointment. Disappointment is one of the strangest and maybe worst feelings in the world. I don't want to be "not good enough". On the other hand, I have just realised this no expecting attitude has perhaps made me apathetic towards a lot of important issues. I probably need to expect more out of myself rather than the world.

A few days ago, I made the trip down to the local art gallery. In the ground floor there's a room full of replicas of famous sculptures around the world. Everytime I go there, the only sculputre which always has intrigued me is the Torso of Belvedere. Looking at it can send me into a hazy daydream within the depths of my imagination wondering to whom this torso actually belong too. It could have been anything, like an elephant head or something.

The Torso of Belvedere was the inspiration for Michelangelo. He would sleep, sit, eat, breathe in front of this sculpture for days on end until (I imagine) he would be inspired to such an end that he would create the most beautiful pieces of art, most notably the paintings in the Sistine Chapel. Each magnificent sculpture would be contained within one block of marble. With effort, care and vision, a piece of art would be created. I would like to look at my future in that way.

It all seems like fancy talk, repetetively listening to "Daniel" by Bat For Lashes while writing this. Maybe that song is my Torso for Belvedere.

When I run in the dark...Daniel...